The Wife He Couldn't Forget Read online

  A husband’s amnesia means a second chance at love in this story by USA TODAY bestselling author Yvonne Lindsay

  After an accident leaves Xander Jackson with no memory of the past several years, he doesn’t realize he walked out on his marriage. And his wife, Olivia, grabs this chance to start over with the man she still desires.

  Allowing Xander to believe they’re still the passionate, loving couple they once were is one thing. But Olivia must also hide all evidence of the devastating loss that destroyed their relationship. It’s the biggest gamble of her life...and everything depends on reclaiming Xander’s heart.

  Olivia snuggled up closer to Xander, loving the fact she could.

  “I was thinking about the accident,” Xander said, “and wondering when the last time was that I told you how much you mean to me. It frightened me to think I might have died without ever telling you again. And I wanted to thank you.”

  “Thank me? Why? I’m still your wife.”

  She gasped. Would he pick up on the slip she’d made referring to herself as still being his wife?

  “You’ve been so patient with me since I was released from the hospital. I appreciate it.”

  He leaned closer until his lips touched hers. Olivia felt her body unfurl with response to his touch. She couldn’t help it—she kissed him back. Their lips melding to one another as if they’d never been apart. But doing this was perpetuating another lie.

  With a groan of regret, Olivia gently pulled away. “If that’s how you show your appreciation, remind me to do more for you,” she said, injecting a note of flippancy she was far from feeling.

  Somehow she had to get them back to where they once had been.

  Dear Reader,

  I guess I’m as guilty as anyone of being forgetful a time or two (actually, my family might suggest it is a little more often than a time or two!), but I can’t imagine much worse than losing an entire chunk of your life’s memories in one fell swoop and waking up one day to discover that everything you’ve done in the past six years is lost to you.

  This is what happens to investment banker Xander Jackson in The Wife He Couldn’t Forget. Xander wakes up in the hospital after a car wreck, demanding the hospital let his wife, Olivia, know he’s okay. Thing is, he and his wife have been separated for two years now and their divorce is on the brink of finalization. For Olivia, this is the chance to rebuild their life together again—with a completely clean slate and to forget the mistakes of the past—but after all they went through, is that even possible? Can you ever go back to how things were before?

  This story, my thirtieth title with Harlequin, made for some very interesting developments for both me as an author and for the characters and really tugged on my heartstrings as I hope it will tug on yours. I also really enjoyed setting this story in Auckland’s picturesque historical suburb of Devonport, and I’d encourage you to visit there if you’re ever in New Zealand. In the meantime, I love to hear from my readers. You can reach me on Facebook, facebook.com/yvonnelindsayauthor, and through Twitter, twitter.com/yvonnelindsay, or email me via my website, yvonnelindsay.com.

  Happy reading!

  Yvonne Lindsay

  The Wife He Couldn’t Forget

  Yvonne Lindsay

  A typical Piscean, USA TODAY bestselling author Yvonne Lindsay has always preferred her imagination to the real world. Married to her blind date hero and with two adult children, she spends her days crafting the stories of her heart, and in her spare time she can be found with her nose in a book reliving the power of love, or knitting socks and daydreaming. Contact her via her website: yvonnelindsay.com.

  Books by Yvonne Lindsay

  HARLEQUIN DESIRE

  The Wife He Couldn’t Forget

  Wed at Any Price

  Honor-Bound Groom

  Stand-In Bride’s Seduction

  For the Sake of the Secret Child

  The Master Vintners

  The Wayward Son

  A Forbidden Affair

  One Secret Night

  The High Price of Secrets

  Wanting What She Can’t Have

  The Wedding Bargain

  Visit the Author Profile page at Harlequin.com, or yvonnelindsay.com, for more titles.

  This story is dedicated to my fabulous readers, whose continued support I cherish.

  Contents

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Excerpt

  One

  She hated hospitals.

  Olivia swallowed hard against the acrid taste that settled on her tongue and the fearful memories that whispered through her mind as she entered the main doors and reluctantly scoured the directory for the department she needed.

  Needed, ha, now there was a term. The last thing she needed was to reconnect with her estranged husband, even if he’d apparently been asking for her. Xander had made his choices when he left her two years ago, and she’d managed just fine, thank you, since then. Fine. Yeah, a great acronym for freaked out, insecure, neurotic and emotional. That probably summed it up nicely. She didn’t really need to even be here, and yet she was.

  The elevator pinged, and its doors slid open in front of her. She fought the urge to turn tail and run. Instead, she deliberately placed one foot in front of the other, entering the car and pressing the button for the floor she needed.

  Damn, there was that word again. Need. Four measly letters with a wealth of meaning. It was right up there with want. On its own insignificant, but when placed in the context of a relationship where two people were heading in distinctly different directions it had all the power in the world to hurt. She’d overcome that hurt. The pain of abandonment. The losses that had almost overwhelmed her completely. At least she’d thought she had, right up until the phone call that had jarred her from sleep this morning.

  Olivia gripped the strap of her handbag just that little bit tighter. She didn’t have to see Xander if she didn’t want to—even if he had apparently woken from a six-week coma last night demanding to see her. Demanding, yes, that would be Xander. Nothing as subtle as a politely worded request. She sighed and stepped forward as the doors opened at her floor, then halted at the reception area.

  “Can I help you?” the harried nurse behind the counter asked her, juggling an armful of files.

  “Dr. Thomas, is he available? He’s expecting me.”

  “Oh, you’re Mrs. Jackson? Sure, follow me.”

  The nurse showed her into a blandly decorated private waiting room, then left, saying the doctor would be with her shortly.

  Unable to sit, Olivia paced. Three steps forward. Three steps back. And again. They really ought to make these rooms bigger, she thought in frustration. The click of the door opening behind her made her spin around. This was the doctor, she assumed, although he looked far too young to be a neurological specialist. />
  “Mrs. Jackson, thank you for coming.”

  She nodded and took his proffered hand, noting the contrast between them—his clean, warm and dry, hers paint stained and so cold she’d begun to wonder if she’d lost all circulation since she’d received the news about Xander.

  “You said Xander had been in an accident?”

  “Yes, he lost control of his car on a wet road. Hit a power pole. His physical injuries have healed as well as could have been expected. Now he’s out of the coma, he’s been moved from the high-dependency unit and onto a general ward.”

  “And his accident? I was told it happened six weeks ago? That’s a long time to be in a coma, isn’t it?”

  “Yes, it is. He’d been showing signs of awareness these past few days, and his nerve responses were promising. Then last night he woke fully, asking for you. It caught the staff by surprise. Only his mother was listed as next of kin.”

  Olivia sank into a chair. Xander? Asking for her? On the day he’d left her he’d said they had nothing to say to each other anymore. Were they talking about the same man?

  “I...I don’t understand,” she finally managed.

  “His other injuries aside, Mr. Jackson is suffering from post-traumatic amnesia. It’s not unusual after a brain injury—in fact, studies show that less than 3 percent of patients experience no memory loss.”

  “And he’s not in that 3 percent.”

  The doctor shook his head. “Post-traumatic amnesia is a phase people go through following a significant brain injury, when they are confused, disoriented and have trouble with their memory, especially short-term memory loss. Although, Mr. Jackson’s case is a little more unusual with some long-term memory loss evident. I take it you were unaware of his accident?”

  “I rarely see anyone who is in regular contact with him and I was never particularly close with his mother. I’m not surprised no one told me. I haven’t seen Xander since he walked out on our marriage two years ago. We’re just waiting for a court date to complete our divorce.”

  Olivia shuddered. Even now she couldn’t keep the bitterness from her voice.

  “Ah, I see. That makes things problematic then.”

  “Problematic?”

  “For his release.”

  “I don’t understand.” Olivia furrowed her brow as she tried to make sense of the doctor’s words.

  “He lives alone, does he not?”

  “As far as I know.”

  “He believes he’s coming home to you.”

  Shock held her rigid in her chair. “H-he does?”

  “He believes you are still together. It’s why he’s asking for you. His first words when he woke up were, ‘Tell my wife I’m okay.’”

  Dr. Thomas began to explain the nature of Xander’s injuries, but his words about loss of physical form due to the length of his coma and difficulties with short-term memory on top of the longer-term memory loss barely filtered through. All she could think of was that after all this time, her estranged husband wanted her.

  “Excuse me,” she interrupted the doctor. “But just how much does Xander remember?”

  “As far as we can tell, his most recent clear memory is from about six years ago.”

  “But that was just after we married,” she blurted.

  That meant he remembered nothing of them finishing renovations on their late 1800s home overlooking Cheltenham Beach, nothing of the birth of their son five years ago.

  Nothing of Parker’s death just after he turned three.

  She struggled to form the words she needed to ask her next question.

  “Can he...does he...will he remember?”

  The doctor shrugged. “It’s possible. It’s also possible he may never remember those lost years or that he may only regain parts of them.”

  She sat silently for a moment, letting the doctor’s words sink in; then she drew in a deep breath. She had to do this. “Can I see him now?”

  “Certainly. Come with me.”

  He led Olivia to a large room on the ward. There were four beds, but only one, near the window, was occupied. She steeled herself to move forward. To look at the man she’d once pledged her life to. The man she’d loved more than life itself and who she’d believed loved her equally in return. Her heart caught as she gazed on his all-too-familiar face, and she felt that same tug anew when she saw the similarities to Parker. They’d been like peas in a pod. She rubbed absently at the ache in the center of her chest, as if the motion could relieve the gaping hole there.

  “He’s sleeping naturally, but he’ll probably wake soon,” the doctor said at her side after a cursory glance at Xander’s notes. “You can sit with him.”

  “Th-thank you,” she replied automatically, lowering herself onto the seat at his bedside, her back to the window and the sunshine that sparkled on the harbor in the distance.

  Olivia let her eyes drift over the still figure lying under the light covers. She started at his feet, skimming over the length of his legs and his hips before drifting over his torso and to his face. He’d lost weight and muscle mass—his usually powerful frame now leaner, softer. A light beard covered his normally clean-shaven jaw, and his hair was in dire need of a cut.

  She couldn’t help it. She ached for him. He would hate being this vulnerable and exposed. Xander was a man used to action, to decisiveness. To acting rather than being acted on. Lying helpless in a hospital bed like this would normally drive him nuts. Olivia started in shock as Xander’s eyes opened and irises of piercing gray met hers. Recognition dawned in Xander’s gaze, and her heart wrenched as he smiled at her, his eyes shining in genuine delight. She felt the connection between them as if it were a tangible thing—as if it had never been stretched to the breaking point by circumstances beyond both of their control. Her lips automatically curved in response.

  How long had it been since she’d seen his smile? Far, far too long. And she’d missed it. She’d missed him. For two awful, lonely years Olivia had tried to fool herself that you could fall out of love with someone just as easily as you had fallen in love with him, if you tried hard enough. But she’d been lying to herself. You couldn’t flip a switch on love, and you couldn’t simply shove your head in a hole in the ground and pretend someone hadn’t been the biggest part of your life from the day you’d met him.

  She loved him still.

  “Livvy?” Xander’s voice cracked a little, as if it was rusty and disused.

  “It’s me,” she replied shakily. “I’m here.”

  Tears burned in her eyes. Her throat choked up, and she reached out to take his hand. The tears spilled down her cheeks as she felt his fingers close tight around hers. He sighed, and his eyes slid closed again. A few seconds passed before he croaked one word.

  “Good.”

  She fought back the sob that billowed from deep inside. On the other side of the bed Dr. Thomas cleared his throat.

  “Xander?”

  “Don’t worry—he’s sleeping again. One of the nurses will be by soon to do observations. He’ll probably wake again then. Now, if you’ll excuse me...?”

  “Oh, yes, sure. Thank you.”

  She barely noticed the doctor leave, or one of the other patients shuffling into the room with his walker and a physical therapist hovering beside him. No, her concentration was fixed solely on the man in the bed in front of her and on the steady, even breaths that raised his chest and lowered it again.

  Her thoughts scattered to and fro, finally settling on the realization that Xander could have died in the accident that had stolen his memory and she might never have known about it. That she might never have had another opportunity to beg him for one more chance. It opened a whole new cavern of hurt inside her until she slammed it closed. He hadn’t died, she reminded herself. He’d lived. And he’d forgotten that he’d e
ver ended things between them.

  Xander’s fingers were still locked around hers. As if she was his anchor. As if he truly wanted her to be there with him. She leaned forward and gently lifted his hand up against her cheek. He was warm, alive. Hers? She hoped so. In fact she wanted him as deeply and as strongly right now as she had ever wanted him. A tiny kernel of hope germinated deep inside Olivia’s mind. Could his loss of memory allow them that second chance he’d so adamantly refused?

  Right here, right now, she knew that she’d do anything to have him back.

  Anything.

  Including pretending the problems in their past had never happened? she asked herself. The resounding answer should have shocked her, but it didn’t.

  Yes. She’d do even that.

  Two

  Olivia let herself in the house and closed the door, leaning back against it with a sigh as she tried to release the tension that now gripped her body. It didn’t make a difference. Her shoulders were still tight and felt as if they were sitting up around her ears, and the nagging headache that had begun on the drive home from the hospital grew even more persistent.

  What on earth had she done?

  Was it lying to allow Xander to continue to believe they were still happily married? How could it be a lie when it was what he believed and when it was what she’d never stopped wanting?

  You couldn’t turn back the clock. You couldn’t undo what was done five minutes ago any more than you could undo what happened in the past two years. But you could make a fresh start, and that’s what they were going to do, she argued with herself.

  It might not be completely ethical to take advantage of his amnesia this way, and she knew that she was running a risk—a huge risk—by doing so. At any moment his memory could return and, with it, Xander’s refusal to talk through their problems or lean on her for help of any kind. Yet if there was a chance, any chance that they could be happy again, she had to take it.

  She pushed off the door and walked down the hall toward the large entertainer’s kitchen they’d had so much fun renovating after they’d moved into the two-story late nineteenth-century home a week after their marriage. She automatically went through the motions, putting the kettle on and boiling water for a pot of chamomile tea. Hopefully that would soothe the headache.